510 Questions to Ask before Marriage to Make Sure You’re Truly Compatible
In this article, we have come up with some of the most important questions to ask before marriage. When we think of finding someone, falling in love, and getting engaged, we seldom consider one of the probable outcomes of marriage: divorce.
Unfortunately, divorce is a reality in some partnerships. But there’s a fine line between realism and scaremongering—just because divorce happens doesn’t mean it has to happen to you.
While you can’t stop life (including unanticipated roadblocks and challenges) from getting in the way, you can make your connection as strong as possible to endure them. And, ideally, this begins well before you marry.
Although you would think that everyone has those big, essential relationship chats before they tie the knot, you’d be amazed at how many concerns are brushed under the rug or neglected entirely.
Asking the proper questions to ask before marriage can help you get off on the right foot for married life—and keep divorce at bay. So here are some of significant questions to ask before getting married.
Best Questions to Ask before Marriage
You will need to ask each other some great questions at some time throughout your dating and engaged lives. Your partner’s responses will be incredibly telling and eye-opening. Here are some best questions to ask before marriage for you to utilize.
1. What is your idea of perfect relaxation?
2. What makes you most joyful and what do you do when you are joyful?
3. What makes you most insecure and how do you handle your insecurities?
4. Do you make an effort to keep your apartment block tidied up?
4. Is there a feeling of mutual trust between yourself and your local community?
5. Have you ever donated to a charity? What kind?
6. Would you volunteer for a cause you believe in?
7. What makes you most secure?
8. What are your views on having a pet?
9. What would you pick between a cat, a dog, or an entirely different animal as a pet?
10. If I had a pet, would you be willing to care for it even though you didn’t like it?
11. Have you ever hit an animal? If so, what was the reason?
12. Did you have to put down a pet? How did it make you feel?
13. Do you try and block time for involvement in your local community?
14. Would you say you get along with your neighbors?
15. Should there be a big fence between your house and your neighbor’s, or no fence at all?
16. Have you ever had to take a neighbor to court, or have you had any other serious grievances?
17. Do you collaborate with your local community on projects for homeless people or other disfavored groups?
18. Have you ever spent too much money charitably?
19. What does your ideal day off look like?
20. What does your ideal vacation look like?
21. How do you feel about my single friends? Would it be ok if I partied with them once in a while?
22. What is your attitude towards drugs and drinking?
23. How do you feel about my cleanliness and neatness standards?
24. How will we divide the chores?
25. Who will do the shopping and cooking in our relationship?
26. How often do you plan to eat out? And what kind of restaurants do you enjoy most?
27. How important is it for you to eat at the dinner table, with no tv or electronic distractions?
28. Do you judge people who have a different waking and sleeping clock than you?
29. Are you a physically affectionate person?
30. What is your favorite season of the year?
31. What emotion describes how you feel about getting married?
32. Do you consider yourself an easygoing person, or are you most comfortable with a firm plan of action?
33. How much sleep do you need every night?
34. Do you like to be freshly showered and wearing clean clothes every day, even on weekends or vacations?
Deep Questions to Ask before Marriage
It only takes one day to be married, and then you have the rest of your life to ponder about. So, use these deep questions to ask before marriage to discuss your life goals.
1. Are you aware of your own biases, or do you sometimes surprise yourself with your decisions and actions?
2. What would be your reaction if your child dated someone of another nationality, ethnicity, or political views?
3. How often do you masturbate on your own?
4. What turns you on?
5. Do you believe there should be equity between men and women, or that some jobs and roles are better filled by one of the s#xes?
6. Is dancing a big part of who you are? Do you express emotions and celebrate this way?
7. Is there anything you feel is missing from your s#xual relationship?
8. Is it a problem if you have to work with members of multiple ethnicities, cultures, and beliefs?
9. How would you handle it if your s#x life became boring?
10. Were you raised in a family with traditional values?
11. Would you prefer you were born in a different culture?
12. What’s more important: the needs of the many, or the needs of the few?
13. Would you sacrifice some of your own happiness & financial security in order to help somebody else?
14. Are you willing to respect another person’s culture and traditions even if you don’t agree with them?
15. Do you expect others to adjust to your own culture?
16. Are you satisfied with the way your s#x life is right now?
17. What is your favorite s#x position?
18. How did you parents use to describe the difference between ethnicities?
19. Do you carry any prejudiced beliefs which you nonetheless want to hang on to?
20. Could you become friends with a member of a group which you have a dislike for?
21. Will we have children, and if we do, will you change diapers?
22. Will our experiences with our exes help or hinder us?
23. How important is religion? How will we celebrate religious holidays, if at all?
24. Is my debt your debt? Would you be willing to bail me out?
Funny Questions to Ask before Marriage
Conversations about marriage shouldn’t be all boring. You can try and get to know about your future spouse using some fun way. Here are some funny questions to ask before marriage.
1. What’s the worst movie you’ve ever seen?
2. If you were given the chance to live the life of any fictional character, who would it be and why?
3. Which color do you identify with most?
4. Which do you prefer: the sunrise or the sunset?
5. Have you ever been kissed by the same s#x?
6. What does your dream vacation look like?
7. What does your dream house look like?
8. Who was your childhood celebrity crush?
8. If you could swap lives with anyone in the world for a day, who would it be and why?
9. Growing up, what were the nicknames that people gave to you?
10. Would you rather live in a glacial environment or a desert environment?
11. What’s the first thing you’d do if you won the lottery?
12. If you passed away today, what would you want your final arrangements to be?
13. What were your favorite shows when you were a child?
14. Have you ever done a dare for money?
15. What should we name our very own planet?
16. What would you do if you suddenly turned completely invisible for a day?
17. If you were given the chance to bring one fictional character into our reality, who would it be?
18. Given the power to go back in time, what’s the one thing that you would change in the history of our world?
19. Would you rather always speak your mind or never speak again?
20. If a genie granted you three wishes, what would they be?
21. What is the funniest prank you’ve ever played on someone?
22. Would you rather have nosy neighbors or noisy neighbors?
23. If you had a clone, how would you make use of him/her?
24. What scene from a non-horror movie scared you as a child?
25. As a school kid, did you ever do anything that warranted you getting sent to the principal’s office?
26. What are the most exciting things you’ve ever done on a dare?
27. What fashion fail did you embrace?
28. What’s the craziest dream you’ve ever had?
Important Questions to Ask before Marriage
A lot of individuals don’t realize how well-planned their lives are until they get married. When anything happens to disrupt that plan, it might strain the relationship. So, utilizing these important questions to ask before marriage, you should strive to get to know your fiancé a little better.
1. What’s your ideal place to live in?
2. What would you choose between a big city and a small town?
3. Are you handy with tools and power tools, or do you rely on professional services?
4. Is your home a place of refuge where few people are allowed, or is your door always open?
5. Is music an ever present element in your home, or would you rather stay and do household chores in silence?
6. Do you watch tv or streaming services/vods before going to bed?
7. Do you use your smartphone in bed before sleep or after you wake up?
8. Do you feel the need to have a spot in the house that’s just yours and no one’s allowed in there?
9. Did you ever end a relationship because you weren’t given enough space where you lived?
10. Do you want to be rich? How important is money for you?
11. Would you be ok with just you being employed from the two of us?
12. Would you be ok if you stayed at home, and only I had a job?
13. Do you want to have a shared bank account, or should they be separate?
14. If you’d suddenly be outrageously rich, would you significantly change your life? If yes, how would you change it?
15. Do you have a child from a previous relationship?
16. Before we get married, do you want to have a prenuptial contract? Why yes, or why not?
17. Would you want us to set a specific amount we’re willing to spend every month?
18. Are you good with handling finances like tax? Which one of us would be doing the math?
19. Do you owe anyone, whether person or organization, a significant amount of money? Would we be paying it back together?
20. Have you ever frequented gambling places? Do you gamble presently?
21. Are you “cheap” when it comes to purchasing products or services?
22. If we’re really tight on money, would you still want to put aside some cash strictly for entertainment and passions?
23. Was money a big part of your previous relationships?
24. Did you pay for everything?
25. Did you break up because of money?
26. Do you have any concepts of polygamy? Is this something you’d want?
27. What’s your education level? Are you proud about it? Do you want to increase it?
28. Are you always looking forward to learning something new?
29. Do you have a car, or is travelling by bus, tram or subway a better option?
30. If you have a car, how important is it? Does it matter more than where you live?
31. Do you spend a lot of time washing, polishing and generally taking care of your vehicle?
32. Are you a good driver in your eyes?
33. Do you have speeding tickets or other such troubles?
34. Do you prefer being awake during the day or the night?
35. Are you quick to judge people?
36. Do you enjoy physical affection, or are words of appreciation and actions of love enough?
37. If you’ve just had a disagreement, do you avoid the other person in anger, or are you quick to get over it?
38. When you disagree with someone, do you tend to use arguments and debate, or do your emotions take over quickly?
39. How would you fairly assign household chores?
40. Do you seek utmost freedom, or is a planned out routine better?
41. Does not having a routine scare you? Are you afraid of uncertainty?
42. Is it important to shower daily and wear new sets of clothes?
43. Can you relax for long periods of time without having work related thoughts or other worries?
44. What’s one thing that immediately makes you angry?
45. What’s one thing that couldn’t ever make you angry?
46. What’s a pet peeve that others really have to respect, or you feel unappreciated?
47. What’s your opinion on cheating in order to achieve a desired outcome?
48. What’s that one thing which you’re really good at?
49. Is there something specific which drains you of your life force?
50. When you feel at your weakest, what do you do to cheer up or get back on your feet?
51. Do you have any phobias? Do they affect how you manage your daily life?
52. Do you feel ready to get married? If not, then do you think that you’ll ever feel ready?
53. How well do you think that I fit in your life? Were there times when I bothered your daily routine?
54. Do you think there’s something in your life right now that would prevent us from having a happy marriage?
Great Questions to Ask before Marriage
Sometimes there’s an unfinished discussion or lingering concern that you simply can’t seem to bring up at the correct time. You may simply utilize these great questions to ask before marriage by setting up a committed time to inquire about these concerns directly.
1. Do you enjoy traveling?
2. How often would you like to travel?
3. Where would you like to travel?
4. How important is spending time alone to you?
5. How would you feel about me going on a trip with the girls (boys) for a couple of weeks?
6. How important is spending time with friends to you?
7. What would be the perfect weekday evening to you?
8. What would we do if we both had a break from work, but each of us had different ideas on how to spend it?
9. Which would you choose – dishes or laundry?
10. What to do you want to do during retirement?
11. At what age would you like to retire?
12. Do you enjoy your job?
13. Have you ever considered a field change?
14. Are you expected to work overtime?
15. Do you have to travel a lot? Do you make an effort to stay home as much as possible?
16. If you could change your career today, would you do it?
17. Is your work more important than your passions?
18. Are you willing to work on weekends?
19. Do you have a private pension fund? How much do you invest monthly?
20. How do you see your retirement looking like?
21. How many jobs have you quit?
22. Were you ever fired? What were the reasons?
23. Are you ambitious? Is your workplace more of a job, or a career?
24. Has work interfered with your personal relationships before?
25. How much do you earn per month or per year?
26. How important is work ethic to you? What’s your work style?
27. How long have you been employed? Did you work during high school, or only years after graduating?
28. Do you commute to work? How long does that take on average? Around when would you get home?
29. Do you spend a lot of time in front of the mirror?
30. How do you feel about one of us being a stay-at-home parent?
31. If we’re together out in the town, should our outfits match?
32. Would you consider plastic surgery to “fix” something which you view as an imperfection?
33. Are you self-conscious about your weight?
34. Would you become angry or dissatisfied if I gained a noticeable amount of weight?
35. Are you really in touch with fashion?
36. How much do you spend on clothes?
37. Do you have a good opinion about how you look?
38. Are you worried your looks are going to fade with old age?
39. Is there something in particular you dislike about yourself?
40. Would you still love me if I suffered an accident and remained scarred?
42. Is strong physical attraction a necessity for you to connect deeply with someone?
43. Do you wish to always be viewed as attractive?
44. Have you gotten a haircut in the past because someone commented passingly that your hair is messy?
45. How long does it take you to get over an insult?
46. Are there people whose opinions you really don’t value at all?
47. What ways do you find best to handle bad behavior?
48. How long would you want to wait after marriage to have kids?
Questions to Ask before Marriage for Yourself
It often happens that people often devalue themselves or take themselves for granted. They should be sincere with themselves and ask themselves certain questions before they commit themselves to getting married. Here are some questions to ask yourself before marriage.
1. Are we looking in the same direction?
2. Are we growing together?
3. Where is this going?
4. Am I with a good person?
5. Do we really accept one another?
6. Am I happy to be in this relationship?
7. Am I feeling trapped?
8. What am I doing to hold us back?
9. Is this relationship balanced?
10. Can we have fun together?
11. Can we have fun apart?
12. Why am I in this relationship?
Questions to Ask before Marriage for Your Partner
Divorce is extremely prevalent, as well as costly and emotionally taxing. Even among those who oppose divorce, unhappy marriages abound. To prevent all of that, you need some answers, and those answers require questions. Here are some questions to ask your partner before marriage.
1. Have you ever been uncomfortable on a daily basis in past relationships?
2. Do you think you’ve caused your previous partners any insecurities?
3. Did they specifically point out something to you?
4. When were you sure for the first time that you loved someone?
5. Did you tell them straight away, or did you have to come to terms with it?
6. How long was your previous relationship?
7. What’s the longest length of time you’ve been together with someone?
8. Have you been married before?
9. Are you willing to talk of previous partners?
10. What are some things you’re really not proud of from previous relationships?
11. Do you believe in spanking as punishment?
12. Did you ever go to relationship counseling or coaching?
13. Were you ever engaged? If so, why didn’t you go ahead with the marriage?
14. Did you live together with your previous partners?
15. Are you afraid that at some point, i’ll tell you that I no longer love you?
16. What did your past experiences teach you?
17. Did you notice a recurring factor that kept leading to break-ups?
18. Do you find yourself thinking about your ex a lot?
19. What kind of house do you want to live in?
20. How do you want to spend your holidays?
21. When do you feel the most loved by each other?
22. How do you express your love for each other?
23. Do you like to travel? Where would you like to travel?
24. What is the picture-perfect weekday evening for both of you?
25. What do you like to do on the weekend?
26. Do you like sleeping in on the weekend?
27. Which chore would you rather do – dishes or laundry?
28. Do you like pets? How many pets do you want?
29. What are your favorite movies and tv shows?
30. What do you do when you’re not feeling “in love?”
31. When have you felt most connected and loved in our relationship?
32. What is the most romantic thing we have done together, and why?
33. What do you think marriage means?
34. Why do you want to be married, and why do you want to be married to me?
35. How do you envision your life in five years? In ten years?
36. Do you have religious beliefs that I don’t already know about?
37. Is there anything you would like me to change or give up after we get married?
38. Do you need to have some time alone and, if so, how often?
39. How much do you value time together, versus time apart?
40. Should we sign a prenuptial agreement before we get married?
41. Would you follow the advice of your family over my advice?
42. What are your financial goals?
43. When I’m angry do you feel criticized?
Questions to Ask before Marriage for Your Fiancé
Here are questions to ask your fiancé before marriage. I advise individuals to have these talks before they become engaged, since it can be difficult to walk away once you start planning a wedding and are happy about it.
1. What are your views on infidelity?
2. What are your religious views on marriage?
3. What’s more important, work or family?
4. What are your political views?
5. What are your views on birth control?
6. Would you rather be rich and miserable or poor and happy?
7. Who will make the biggest decisions of the household?
8. What would you do if someone said something bad about me?
9. What do you believe the role of a wife is?
10. Who should do household chores?
11. What do you believe the role of a husband is?
12. Do you want kids? How should we prepare for it, especially if we face trouble conceiving naturally?
13. Should we consider getting tested for stis before we get intimate?
14. How important is physical intimacy for you?
15. Should we consider signing pre-nups?
16. Where will we live after we get married?
17. How do you suggest we divide the household responsibilities?
18. What do you think our obligations to both sets of parents should be?
19. How should we plan our daily finances, so we’re both contributing our fair share?
20. What are your long-term financial goals?
21. Can we arrange a meeting with a financial planner so we’re secure and have equal share in our assets?
22. How do you like to divide your time between family, friends and hobbies?
23. Where do you see us five years from now?
24. How will we make time for our relationship after becoming parents?
25. What parental responsibilities will we take on as individuals?
26. How will we respond in a situation concerning our child’s s#xuality?
27. What religious beliefs or values do we want to pass on?
28. How do we want to go about disciplining our child?
29. What sacrifices or changes are we willing to make for our family unit, in the event of a rough patch?
Questions to Ask before Marriage for Your Boyfriend
Marriage may also be fantastic, but it’s vital to take the time to halt and thoroughly examine if you should marry your boyfriend. Here are some questions to ask your boyfriend before marriage.
1. What would you do if we fell out of love?
2. What are your career aspirations?
3. What would you like to be doing five or ten years from now?
4. What do you think is the best way to keep the love alive in a marriage?
5. How do you think life will change if we got married?
6. What is the best thing about marriage?
7. What is the worst thing about marriage?
8. What is your idea of the best weekend?
9. How important are wedding anniversaries to you?
10. How would you like to spend special days?
11. What kind of grandparent do you want to be someday?
12. What type of house do you want to live in?
13. What is your biggest fear about marriage?
14. What excites you about getting married?
15. What do wedding rings mean to you?
16. Are you afraid to talk to me about anything?
17. What do you think would improve our relationship?
18. What would be one thing you would change about our relationship?
19. Do you have any doubts about the future of our relationship?
20. Do you believe love can pull you through anything?
21. Is there anything you don’t trust about me?
22. How often do you meet up with your friends?
23. Do you have a close friend of the opposite s#x? Would it be a problem if I did?
24. What comes first: friends or your romantic relationship?
25. Have you ever refused to help a friend in need? If so, why?
26. Is it important for you to like my friends? Does it matter if they like you? What about me and your friends?
27. What ways do you think is best to reward a child?
28. Do you lend your friends money? How much?
29. Do you think your friends would be there for you if you needed them?
30. Have you ever felt a rift in communication between you and your friends?
Questions to Ask before Marriage for Couples
This is a list of questions for couples before marriage that every couple must ask themselves, established in partnership with a team of experts to assist you in addressing the deal-breakers and heart-stoppers.
1. How do you handle change and the unexpected?
2. How well do we currently handle disagreements with each other?
3. Is your parent’s marriage part of your inspiration to marry? If so, why? And if not, why is that?
4. What if we’re not able to have biological children?
5. How do you see kids fitting into our life?
6. How will you handle it if we drift apart?
7. How do you expect to cope with our s#xual ebbs and flows?
8. How do you expect to get s#xual needs met, if I’m not meeting them?
9. How do you imagine spending the holidays?
10. What’s your take on vacations, and how often would you like to take them?
11. Do you want to save a lot early on, or save up in bursts for things like a vacation or a new tv?
12. Do you want separate bank accounts, or to share all assets?
13. Do we agree on the division of labor in our house?
14. When do you feel the most loved by me?
15. How do you express love?
16. When do you feel unsafe sharing your feelings with me?
17. When you reflect back on your childhood, what memories bring the most joy? Which bring the most pain?
18. Do we appropriately respect any religious, spiritual, or political differences between us?
19. Whose career would take precedence, if it became necessary?
20. Do either of us have any major secrets we haven’t yet shared?
21. Are you committed to counseling, if and when we need it?
Questions to Ask before Marriage for Your Spouse
Everyone who is planning to marry has a tale or a narrative in their brain about what that will entail for them. These questions to ask your spouse before marriage are significant because they will provide you with insight into the aspects of marriage that are most important to your spouse.
1. Would you rather we never do something specific in the bedroom?
2. Are you comfortable talking openly about s#x? If not, why’s that?
3. Are you ok with initiating s#x? If not, why?
4. Are you usually in the mood for s#x, or is your drive lower?
5. Have you ever been s#xually abused?
6. When growing up, was your family open about s#x?
7. Is it a topic you talked about with your parents?
8. Would we in turn discuss it with our child, if we had children?
9. Is s#x for you a method to relieve stress?
10. How would you react if I was still friends with an ex?
11. Have you been in an open relationship before?
12. What things do I do that annoy you?
13. Do you need “alone time” even if we’re s#xually active regularly?
14. Is pornography a taboo subject for you?
15. Have you had s#x exclusively with men or women, or did you have multiple experiences in this regard?
16. Have you ever gone to bed angry?
17. Would you say you’re a healthy person?
18. Were you ever hospitalized? If so, what for?
19. Would you be willing to have surgery if it was required?
20. Do you have any chronic conditions which require steady medication to keep under control?
21. Is taking care of yourself a mandatory principle in marriage?
22. Do your parents or extended family have serious illnesses?
23. Do you have medical insurance and dental insurance?
24. Which hospital would be your first pick if you had to be hospitalized?
25. Do you get along with your family doctor? Are they a true professional, or do you want to change them?
26. Do you have a gym membership?
27. Are you into sports? Which ones? Do you want to practice something together?
28. Is exercise a regular activity for you? Are you looking to make it part of your day?
29. Do you think a fight would end your favour? Have you been in any fights?
30. Are you addicted to or do you have to take certain medication daily?
31. Do you follow a diet or some guidelines, or do you just eat whatever, whenever?
32. Have you ever had an std? When was your last std check?
33. Do your bones break easier than what’s considered normal?
34. Do you have any conditions which can be a daily problem, like gastrointestinal problems?
35. Does anyone in your family have mental disorders? Do you?
36. Do you have any habits like smoking or drinking? If yes, how often?
37. Do you have any health problems which interfere with your s#x life?
38. Did you ever break up with someone, or has anyone broken up with you because of health related issues?
Questions to Ask before Marriage about Finances
Couples should ensure that they are on the same page whether it comes to financial prudence or irresponsibility. Here are some questions to ask about finances to help them talk about it.
1. How do you feel about debt?
2. Would you share all money with me or split the money into different accounts?
3. What are your views on saving money?
4. What are your views on spending money?
5. What if we both want something but can’t afford both?
6. How well do you budget?
7. Do you feel it is important to save for retirement?
8. Would you be willing to get a second job if we had financial problems?
9. What if a family member wants to borrow a large sum of money?
10. Who will take care of the financial matters of the household?
11. How will we manage finances?
12. Will we merge our finances? Share a bank account?
13. How will we make big financial decisions? How about little ones?
14. Do you have any debt? Will we share responsibility for each other’s debts?
15. Are you a spender or a saver? How much do you have in savings?
16. Do you expect one of us to be the primary earner in this relationship?
17. What happens if one of us loses our job?
18. How much money do you make?
19. How much debt do you have (student loans, credit card, mortgage), if any?
20. How comfortable are you borrowing money?
21. What was your family’s attitude towards money, and how do they resemble to yours?
22. Are you more of a saver or a spender?
23. Are we going to make it a priority to save money together?
24. Do we sign a prenuptial agreement before we get married?
25. Do you agree to consult with me about any significant expense ahead of time, even if you are planning to use your own money?
26. Are you comfortable creating a budget for our married life together?
27. How are we going to share the expenses after we get married?
28. Are we going to have a joint bank account?
29. If you have an ex or children from previous marriages, what are your financial obligations to them?
30. Do you have any other financial obligations to another person, whether for legal or moral reasons, that I should know about?
31. What is important to you financially — owning a house, a nice car, expensive clothing, traveling?
32. What is more important for you: the size of a house or its location?
33. Do you plan to buy or rent?
34. How important is contributing to charity to you, and which charities are your favorites?
35. Who is going to pay the bills?
Questions to Ask before Marriage about Family and Children
When it comes to children, it is critical not to speak what you believe your spouse wants to hear. Before getting married, couples should honestly consider whether or not they want children. How many do they want? When do they intend to have them? And how do they see themselves as parents? Here are some key questions to ask about family and children.
1. How many kids do you want?
2. What values do you want to install in your children?
3. How do you want to discipline your kids?
4. What would you do if one of your children said he was homos#xual?
5. What if our children didn’t want to go to college?
6. How much say do children have in a family?
7. How comfortable are you around children?
8. Would you be opposed to having our parents watch the children so we can spend time alone together?
9. Would you put your children in private or public school?
10. What are your thoughts on home schooling?
11. Would you be willing to adopt if we couldn’t have kids?
12. Would you be willing to seek medical treatment if we couldn’t have kids naturally?
13. Do you believe it’s ok to discipline your child in public?
14. How do you feel about paying for your kid’s college education?
15. How far apart do you want kids?
16. Would you want someone to stay home with the kids or use day care?
17. How would you feel if our kids wanted to join the military rather than go to college?
18. How involved do you want grandparents to be in our parenting?
19. How will we handle parental decisions?
20. How often would you want to visit your family?
21. How often will your family visit us?
22. How often would you want my family to visit?
23. How often would you want to visit my family?
24. Do you have a family history of diseases or genetic abnormalities?
25. What if one of your family members said he disliked me?
26. How would you handle holiday family visits?
27. If your parents became ill, would you take them in?
28. If my parents became ill, would you mind taking them in?
29. Does anyone in your family suffer from alcoholism?
30. What is your medical family history?
31. Would you be opposed to mental health treatment?
32. If I had to change my diet because of medical concerns, would you be willing to change yours?
33. Are you willing to exercise with me to improve our health?
34. Where do you want to live?
35. Would you mind moving if I had to relocate with my job?
36. Do you want us to have children? If so, how many?
37. Would you prefer having a boy or a girl?
38. Are children a way for you to feel fulfilled in life, or do you want children for other reasons?
39. If there was an accidental pregnancy, how would you react? Would you want the baby kept?
40. Who’s going to handle birth control? Me or you?
41. Is adoption a viable option for you? Do you think you could love an adopted child like it was your own?
42. Is abortion a topic up for discussion, or do you have strong beliefs about it?
43. Are you an only child or do you have siblings?
44. While growing up, how did this affect you? How do you think it would affect your parenting style?
45. Is it important to stay in touch with extended family?
46. Would our child spend a lot of time with grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins?
47. Have you had or been the father of a child that was then adopted by someone else? Do you keep tabs on them?
48. Is breastfeeding an appropriate activity to do outside of one’s home?
49. Should a mother, a father, or both, stay with their child for the first year of their life? For 6 months? Not at all?
50. What type of discipline would you want us to use for our child? Spanking? Punishments? The silent treatment?
51. Are the opinions of children important? Would you talk with your child and consult them before making a family decision?
52. Is religion an important aspect of upbringing?
53. Would you be able to handle it if our child would be agnostic, an atheist, or of a different religion by choice?
54. Would you treat your child the same if they were a boy or a girl?
55. Should girls have stricter rules than boys, especially when it comes to their s#x life?
56. If your teenage daughter would be open about being s#xually active with you, would you punish her or advise her to use birth control?
57. Is it necessary for you to like your child’s friends?
58. If you’d choose adoption, would you give your child the option to meet their birth parents? Should they even know they’re adopted?
59. How would you react if your child was racially discriminated against? What if the discrimination was based on gender?
60. What are some things you would want to teach your children?
61. Would you allow your child to “talk back”?
62. Did you previously break up because of different views about having or raising children?
Questions to Ask before Marriage about Goals and Dreams
The balancing of career and family commitments is a typical source of difficulty for millennial couples. Are there gender roles or other preconceived beliefs influencing each partner’s expectations? Is there room for flexibility in balancing your job and personal life? These, as well as many more questions to ask about goals and dreams, are given below.
1. What are your career goals?
2. Would you be understanding if I worked long hours for extended periods of time?
3. What is more important to you, career satisfaction or salary?
4. If I get offered my dream job in another part of the country or state, would you mind moving?
5. Will you be more mindful of taking your rights or giving them?
6. What expectations and goals do you have for your career?
7. What is your dream job? What would you be willing to sacrifice to obtain it?
8. What impact do you want to have on the world?
9. How do you want to be remembered after death?
10. Would you want me to change myself in certain aspects of life?
11. What’s your idea of a truly romantic evening?
12. Do you prefer us to stay with the family or separately?
13. What kind of family traditions would you want to implement?
14. If you had some extra time to do what you want, what would you do?
15. Do you have any specific fantasy regarding marriage?
16. How would you want your wedding to be like?
17. Where do you see your career being in 10 years?
18. Would you like to continue working after marriage?
19. If you were to cook, what is the first meal you will offer me?
20. How passionate are you about your career?
21. Is there anything you would like to talk about your hobbies?
22. Do you prioritize work over other aspects of life?
23. Where do you want to live after marriage?
24. What is your ideal destination for a vacation?
25. What are your views on working from home or remote working?
26. What do you do to deal with setbacks and disappointments in your life?
27. Does having a demanding job support the lifestyle you two enjoy?
28. What led you to choose the profession you’ve chosen?
29. Do our individual career goals conflict with each other?
30. Do you intend to follow this career until pension age? What are your career ambitions?
Questions to Ask before Marriage about Dealing with Conflict
Is one of you so obstinate that you never seem to compromise? Or are you so afraid of conflicts that you never say anything and avoid conflict in a fight?
These are unhealthy patterns that should be addressed prior to marriage. These questions to ask about dealing with conflict can help.
1. Would you be willing to go to marriage counseling if we were having marital problems?
2. If there is a disagreement between me and your family, whose side do you choose?
3. How do you handle disagreements?
4. Would you ever consider divorce?
5. Would you rather discuss issues as they arise or wait until you have a few problems?
6. How would you communicate you aren’t satisfied s#xually?
7. What is the best way to handle disagreements in a marriage?
8. How can I be better at communicating with you?
9. How should we deal with conflict?
10. Are there any relationship issues or past conflicts you’re still thinking about?
11. What is your conflict style — avoidant, accommodating, compromising, or something else?
12. After a fight, do you need personal space or do you like to talk it out?
13. How did your family deal with conflict growing up?
14. How do you usually express anger?
15. How comfortable are you with having arguments or disagreements?
16. What do you think our perpetual conflicts are (those based on personality or lifestyle differences)?
17. What part of me is most annoying to you?
18. What would be an example of a resolvable conflict in our relationship?
19. Can you think of an example of a conflict we had that you felt we dealt with successfully?
20. What would be unacceptable to you in a disagreement?
5 Tips for Choosing Questions to Ask before Marriage
Here are some advantageous tips that will help you choose questions to ask before getting married.
The first stage in developing meaningful questions is to consider them. Note down any and all questions that come to mind throughout this process. The lists given above can assist you with this. Just make sure you choose questions that are relevant to your fiancé.
2. Be true
You may ask the best questions in the world, but if you can’t get your partner to open up and honestly answer them, you won’t be able to create a genuine connection. You must first acquire your fiancé’s trust if you want them to open up to you.
3. Show genuine interest
Would you want to become closer to someone who continuously cuts you off, checks their phone every few seconds, or looks at you blankly until the conversation switches to something they prefer talking about? Probably not.
We gravitate toward those who actually care about what we say or do. Sure, some people appreciate “hard to get,” but statistics show that people prefer those that show real interest in them.
How can you show genuine interest? Aside from giving them your whole attention, be sure to maintain strong eye contact and ask follow-up questions before marriage.
4. Respect their values
A strong connection is built on mutual respect. If you want to build and maintain a deep relationship with your fiancé, you must accept their beliefs, even if you disagree with them.
If you’re just getting to know someone, here’s a plan to help you create a deeper, more meaningful friendship straight immediately. Listen for content that ties to values in what others say first, and then ask questions about it.
5. Listen to understand
How frequently do you listen to understand the feelings, wants, goals, and dreams of others? If i’m fully honest with myself, I recognize that I frequently listen to answer rather than comprehend.
When you listen to comprehend, you are consciously making an effort to not just focus your whole attention on the other person, but also to put yourself in their shoes.
Most importantly, you are really interested in their thoughts and feelings. Instead of meddling, you give them ample space to fully express themselves by asking these questions you should ask before marriage.
Final Thoughts on Questions to Ask before Marriage
You may think you and your significant other know everything about each other by the time you’ve become serious enough to sign a certificate.
However, we are made up of many different sides, and there are numerous subjects that couples should discuss but frequently do not until the walk down the aisle is over.
Use the appropriate questions to ask before marriage to find desires, goals, and aspirations for your life together that you hadn’t considered.
Many well-meaning couples are stumped as to what to talk about before becoming engaged.
Though your objectives and tastes will change over time, she believes that addressing key questions to ask before getting married today will prevent you from future issues.
Or, at the very least, the questions will equip you to properly resolve them together. So we hope you will make good use of the questions to ask before marriage that we have supplied you with, and that it will be beneficial to you.