151 Controversial Relationship Questions to Really Know Your Lover

Relationships are complex and dynamic, and getting to know your partner can be a journey filled with ups and downs.

While some questions are light and fun, others can be deep and challenging.

In this article, we’ve compiled a list of over 150 controversial relationship questions to help you really get to know your lover.

From beliefs to values, these questions will help you dive deeper into your relationship and understand your partner on a deeper level.

Whether you’re just starting out or have been together for years, these debate topics are a great way for strengthening your bond and improving communication.

So, grab a pen and paper and get ready to delve into the most controversial relationship questions!

10 Best Examples to Ask and Benefits

Asking the right questions can help deepen your connection and strengthen your relationship. So, let’s dive in and explore the power of asking the controversial relationship questions in your relationship.

  1. What are your long-term goals and aspirations?

This question helps you understand what your partner values and where they see themselves in the future.

  • What is your deal-breakers in a relationship?

Asking this question allows you to better understand your partner’s boundaries and priorities in a relationship.

  • What do you find most attractive about me?

This question helps build confidence and can also give insight into what your partner values in a relationship.

  • How do you like to handle conflict in a relationship?

Knowing how your partner handles conflict can be beneficial for resolving conflicts and improving communication in the future.

  • What are your biggest fears in a relationship?

This question allows you to better understand your partner’s insecurities and support them in overcoming them.

  • What are your core values and beliefs?

Understanding your partner’s values and beliefs can help you identify common ground and make important decisions together.

  • What makes you feel loved and appreciated?

Knowing what makes your partner feel loved and appreciated can help you show your affection in a way that is meaningful to them.

  • What are your hobbies and interests?

This question helps you learn more about your partner’s passions and can also lead to new shared experiences.

  • How do you like to spend your free time?

Knowing how your partner likes to spend their free time can help you find new ways to connect and bond.

  1. What is your ideal relationship like?

This question helps you understand your partner’s expectations and can help you work towards building the relationship of their dreams.

Tough Controversial Relationship Questions

Here, we’ll explore tough controversial relationship topics for discussion to help you and your partner delve deeper into each other’s beliefs, values, and opinions.

1. Do you think couples need similar interests to be compatible?

2. How would you feel about me having a close friendship with someone of the opposite gender and hanging out one on one?

3. Would you be interested in purchasing a device that calculates the degree to which two people are in love?

4. Did you ever consider keeping me a secret from your friends and family?

5. What would you change about the way you look?

6. What relationship advice would you give yourself if you were to meet in the past?

7. If I told you I was traveling to a party hotspot alone, would you have any concerns?

8. How should you approach expenditure if one person in the relationship earns significantly more than the other?

9. What was the most embarrassing thing you did on a date night?

10. How would you react if I told you I wanted a break from the relationship for a month without any reason?

11. Do you have a backup if this relationship doesn’t work out?

12. If I wanted an open relationship, would you break up with me?

13. How would you feel if you found out that your partner’s colleague had a crush on them? Would you still be ok with them working there?

14. Should a man be the one to propose in heterosexual relationships, or is it ok if the woman takes the initiative instead?

15. How would you feel if I told you that I’d had multiple one-night stands after nights out drinking?

16. In-laws vs. married couples?

17. If we weren’t together anymore, would you envy who I was dating?

18. Is it a problem if there is a language barrier between your family and your partner?

19. Were you serious and fully committed in your last relationship?

20. Am I the top priority in your life?

21. If I were to cheat on you once, would you forgive me?

22. Would you be ok with me going on a girls/boy’s holiday?

23. When we first met, what attracted you to me? Do you still have that same feeling of attraction now?

24. What’s your view on polyamory? Do you think having more than one partner is ok or not?

25. Have you ever slept with a stranger?

26. Could you be in a relationship with someone who had diametrically opposed political views to yours?

27. Is sibling rivalry a positive thing?

28. How do you feel about having an open marriage?

29. If your love for your partner doesn’t grow with time, should you continue with the relationship?

30. What would be a deal-breaker for our relationship, something you couldn’t forgive?

31. What do you think of my best friend? If you don’t think highly of them, tell me why.

32. Does your significant other have the right to access your social media passwords in a committed relationship?

33. Would you think twice about the relationship if your current partner always made fun of you at social gatherings?

Personal Controversial Relationship Questions

Get ready to take your relationship to the next level with this collection of thought-provoking relationship controversial questions.

1. If I were to turn vegan and start eating a plant-based diet, would you join me?

2. How would you feel if we put off moving in together for the time being?

3. What would you say if I told you I had a crush on your best friend at the same time I was dating you?

4. Are you still in love with your ex?

5. What kind of parent do you think you’d be?

6. Are dating apps making love less meaningful?

7. Would a controversial issue – social or political – affect the person you choose to date?

8. When you met my parents for the first time, what annoyed you the most?

9. For how long should a couple date before considering settling down?

10. After dating, for how long should you consider lending money to your partner? What precautions would you take?

11. What do you think about when we make love?

12. What things about my personality bother you the most?

13. Do you remember the last time your lover was in your dreams?

14. What scares you the most in a relationship? Has what you are afraid of changed since you were a child?

15. Would you ever choose money and the perfect job over me?

16. What do you think about online dating?

17. Can love be faked?

18. Is monogamy a natural human trait or a socially enforced requirement?

19. What’s your opinion on people who fall in love with more than one person at once?

20. Is it possible to have similar interests and hobbies with someone yet be incompatible?

21. Do you believe in soulmates?

22. What is a red flag in a relationship for you?

23. Can failure to meet your partner’s sexual desires affect a relationship?

24. Feminism – does it favor a relationship or not?

25. Are personal boundaries important in keeping a relationship alive?

26. Between a man and a woman, who should play a major role in maintaining a lively relationship?

27. Should the man or woman get custody of the children in the event of a divorce? Or should they share custody?

28. Househusband: a good or negative thing?

29. Does money make a relationship more complicated?

30. Is it okay to date someone to just pass the time?

31. At what point should one meet their partner’s parents?

32. Is it possible to reignite the lost love you had for your partner? How would you do it?

33. How can love create miracles in daily life?

34. What makes you excited when in love? What was the last exciting experience you had?

35. How do you tell if one is committed or not?

36. What are the challenges of establishing strong relationships in the world of technology?

37. Surviving heartbreak: males vs. females.

38. What do you believe is more critical, logic or emotions? Why?

39. What do you think about same-sex marriages?

40. Do you believe couples should do everything together or is some level of independence necessary in a relationship?

41. Is it OK to have sex before marriage?

Controversial Relationship Questions to Ask Your Partner

Here, we’ll discuss a list of controversial relationship debate topics to discuss with your partner. These questions will challenge your understanding of each other and promote deeper communication.

1. Would you give sperm or eggs to friends who could not conceive on their own if they asked you to?

2. What are your views on an extra-marital affair?

3. If we got married and then divorced, would you be reasonable when it came to sorting the divorce settlement?

4. Do you think we spend enough time together? Would you like to spend more time together if we could?

5. Would you be happy in a relationship where the other person earns more than you and has a more powerful job?

6. Would you end the relationship if your friends told you they didn’t like me?

7. How would you react if your partner forgot your birthday?

8. Should women change their last names when they get married?

9. How would you break up with someone? If the relationship ended, could you go on without apologizing to the other person?

10. Do men and women have different roles when it comes to parenting? Should strictness be varied between the two?

11. At what point in a relationship should couples discuss their finances?

12. Are you always completely honest with me in our relationship?

13. If a family member needed a kidney, and you were the only match, would you give one up?

14. How many guys/girls have you dated in the past?

15. What was your first impression of me?

16. Should dating tips change as one gets older?

17. Am I giving you what you need from a lover?

18. What are the challenges when someone moves to a new country to be with their partner in a relationship?

19. What would you think of me if you learned I cheated in a previous relationship?

20. Is dating in the 2000s more challenging than dating in the 1980s and 1990s?

21. Do you think of me when you masturbate?

22. Would you care for me if I got super sick or badly disabled?

23. If your partner didn’t like your parents, would that influence your feelings towards them or not?

24. If you were to find out that I had been messaging someone else and the message had a flirty vibe, how would you react?

25. Do you think past relationship secrets should always be kept hidden?

26. Would it be ok if I schedule some alone time (me time) during the week?

27. Why have we not been as intimate recently?

28. If I was severely injured after an accident and could not care for myself, would you stay and look after me?

29. Do you think that you can do better than me?

30. Do you love your friends more than you love me?

31. If you had the choice to start your life again, would you still want to be in a relationship with me?

32. If your partner fell down a rabbit hole related to a conspiracy theory, how would you react?

33. Describe your biggest regret in a previous or current relationship.

34. Would you share all your secrets with your boyfriend or girlfriend?

35. What would you do if you found out that I’d watched the season finale of a Netflix series we’d been watching together alone?

36. Do you ever try and look up your ex on social media?

37. When was the first time you said ‘I love you’ to someone in your life other than family?

38. Have you ever had feelings for someone of the same gender?

39. Would you break up with me if I got a great job in another city?

Controversial Relationship Questions for a Successful Marriage

These controversial marriage questions can help couples establish a strong foundation and anticipate any potential challenges in their future together. Get ready to have open and honest conversations with your partner.

1. Do you think couples need to have similar interests to be compatible?

2. If I had to answer any question you asked me truthfully, what would your top 5 questions be?

3. In the past, have you ever dated two women at once?

4. How would you feel if your partner had to work away for 3 weeks per month?

5. Do you think we spend enough time together? Would you like to spend more time if we could?

6. Is rivalry between siblings a positive thing?

7. How would you feel if I had a close friendship with someone of the opposite

gender and we hung out from time to time?

8. Do you not truly know your partner until you move in together?

9. Would you have still gotten into a relationship with me if you found out that I had cheated on my ex-partner?

10. Are personality or good looks more important when it comes to your partner?

11. Do men and women have different roles when it comes to parenting?

12. If you found out that someone who worked with your partner had a crush on them, how would you feel? Would you still be fine with them working there?

13. Should a man be the one to propose or is it ok for women to take the lead?

14. If you found out that I was seeing someone else, what would you do?

15. If I told you I’d had multiple one-night stands after nights out, how would you feel?

16. What’s something/somebody you would sacrifice your life for?

17. Do you think it’s acceptable if your partner still keeps in contact with some of their exes?

18. How should you comfort an infant crying because they want more toys?

19. If your best friend was cheating on their partner, would you tell him/her?

20. What do you think of my best friend? If you don’t think highly of them, tell me why

21. Should women change their last name when they get married?

22. Would you prefer to have a week without money or have a week not showing any intimacy?

23. How difficult do you think it would be if someone moved to a new country to be with their partner?

24. How would you react if you found out I was messaging someone else in a flirty way?

25. If your partner earned more money than you, would be ok with this?

26. Do you think it’s a problem when there is a large age gap in a relationship?

27. Is it possible to fall in and out of love with someone?

28. Would you mind if your partner was naturally a flirty person but meant nothing by it?

29. Would you think twice about the relationship if your current partner always made fun of you during social gatherings?

30. What do you think about same-gender marriages?

31. If I told you that I didn’t want kids, would you end the relationship?

32. How would you feel If I had zero drive or ambition to work or do anything around the house? Would you still stay in the relationship?

33. If your partner didn’t like your parents, how would you react?

34. How do you feel about having an open marriage policy?

35. Would you end the relationship if my ex came up in conversation all the time?

36. Do you think long-distance relationships can work long-term?

37. Do you think having a holiday fling is terrible?

38. Have you ever set up a fake social media account to follow someone you want to know more about?

Final Thoughts

In conclusion, asking controversial relationship questions can be an excellent way to delve deeper into your relationship and establish a stronger foundation.

These controversial topics for couples can help couples to understand each other’s beliefs, values, and perspectives, leading to a more meaningful and fulfilling connection.

Whether you’re preparing for a successful marriage or simply looking to strengthen your bond with your partner, we hope these questions have been helpful.

We encourage readers to share their thoughts and experiences in the comments section below. Your contributions can help others benefit from your wisdom and insights.

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